There can be some real advantages in doing things the way we’ve always done them – the zillions of little habits we form that take thought and effort out of many areas of life. We don’t need to struggle to learn a new way to tie our shoes because, whatever our method, we can perform that task almost without thinking. If we drive a car, at some point that was awkward, and the skill had to be learned. However, after years of practice, we may almost think of our car as an extension of ourselves – driving with the ease of tying our shoes. This may be well and good for those common and mundane tasks of life, but when we begin to go on “automatic pilot” in regards to our relationships, we shouldn’t be surprised when relational problems begin to surface.
That friend, spouse, and/or child is not just an extension of you like your car. To maintain and deepen our relationships, more is demanded than the mindless manner in which shoes are tied. Relationships of life merit our best innovative energies. I’d recommend taking an audit of all the important relationships in your life. What little extra could you bring to the equation that would spark or remind another of their significance? What routine could you break that would enable better connection? What questions could you ask, conversations could you start, pictures could you take or send that would bring some new energy to your relationship?
Of course, my mind also goes to the spiritual. How many of our spiritual experiences have slipped to just going through the motions like mindlessly tying our shoes or driving to work? What choices could we make to innovate our relationship with the divine? What unique private or corporate experience of worship might spark or remind us of the significance of God?
There can be some real advantages to doing things the way we’ve always done them – until our habits block their original intention, and then it’s time for some creativity! Just as God’s blessings are new every morning, so, with a little more intention, our relationships with the important people in our lives – and with God – can be fresh and new every day.
Andy McDonald